You cannot make other people feel anything they do not choose to feel. You cannot control how other people feel.
The perfect example.
If I hold the door open for a woman, one might thank me and be grateful.
If I hold the door open for a feminist woman, she might be upset, and angry that I didn’t think she could do it herself.
The exact same action on my part, and two completely different responses from the two different women.
So if some action as little as holding a door open creates two totally different feelings in someone else, imagine all the possible ranges of emotions people might experience from bigger actions and expressions.
All of the possible emotional reactions and feelings people experience are because of them. Having nothing to do with what you do or don’t do, say or don’t say.
What does this mean to you?
That what other people do does not control, effect, or dictate how you feel.
How you feel is dependent only on what you do or choose.
The beliefs, the stories you make up in your head, the meaning you give to what others do. All these things and more determine how you react or respond to what other people do and say.
You don’t “choose” to feel mad, or angry, or upset, etc. You choose your beliefs, you choose what meaning you give stuff, you choose all the things that create the feelings and emotions that you experience.
So if you don’t like your feelings or emotions, change your choices about your beliefs and the meaning you make up.